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OfflineCage
Melancholy Mindfuck.


Registered: 01/13/11
Posts: 645
Last seen: 1 year, 10 months
Everything is so.. Monotone..
    #531479 - 02/28/11 11:03 AM (5 years, 9 months ago)

I've been having this feeling for a while now.. I'm starting to suspect that I may be dead inside, or something.. I have the usual, short lived happy moments like always, that hasn't really changed. I guess I've gotten so used to things in my life being messed up somehow, and being stressed ALL the time, that I don't really notice it anymore. My emotions are like, a "get in, get out" task now, I'll be happy with something, and when it fucks up? I just kind of, stop caring.

I guess I've actually managed to rationalize my thoughts to the point where I don't really rely on my emotions for decisions that much anymore.. I guess being kind of, detached, is a down side, but so far it hasn't been that bad really.. I can just do certain things, like workout, without needing any real motivation or passion, I just tell myself to do it, and I do, without laziness or anything else being in the way. I guess there isn't much point to this thread, just kind of wanted to talk about this, and see if anyone's had any similar experiences, it's just weird to me. :shrug:


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OfflineDungenessDank
Lord of the Flies


Registered: 05/06/08
Posts: 9,372
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 3 years, 6 months
Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
    #531480 - 02/28/11 11:06 AM (5 years, 9 months ago)

You'll be happier dead inside.


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OfflineCage
Melancholy Mindfuck.


Registered: 01/13/11
Posts: 645
Last seen: 1 year, 10 months
Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: DungenessDank]
    #531485 - 02/28/11 11:16 AM (5 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

DungenessDank said:
You'll be happier dead inside.



Yeah, I was thinking that too.


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Offlinethenpc
The Flameworker


Registered: 01/22/11
Posts: 68
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
    #531487 - 02/28/11 11:24 AM (5 years, 9 months ago)

I get like that some times... for long amounts of time.

The only thing that I found brings me back to being connected with the world is an ego death, out in nature, but that's not for everyone.


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Offlineamiacriminal
just here

Registered: 02/28/11
Posts: 4
Last seen: 5 years, 9 months
Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
    #531488 - 02/28/11 11:24 AM (5 years, 9 months ago)

maybe you need to establish a solid sense of meaning in your life


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OfflineCage
Melancholy Mindfuck.


Registered: 01/13/11
Posts: 645
Last seen: 1 year, 10 months
Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: amiacriminal]
    #531491 - 02/28/11 11:36 AM (5 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

amiacriminal said:
maybe you need to establish a solid sense of meaning in your life



That's the thing, most things just seem fragile, unreliable, or just meaningless. Pretty much everything requires more effort than it's worth, so I ration emotion.


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Offline81renaissance
Coachella '13 KKOTY
Male


Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 4,181
Loc: State of Mind Flag
Last seen: 4 months, 22 days
Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
    #531495 - 02/28/11 12:16 PM (5 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Cage said:
Quote:

amiacriminal said:
maybe you need to establish a solid sense of meaning in your life



That's the thing, most things just seem fragile, unreliable, or just meaningless. Pretty much everything requires more effort than it's worth, so I ration emotion.




I disagree with the "happier dead inside" concepts.

The whole point isn't that things require more effort than they're worth, its just that people define "worth" incorrectly.
Stay away from the meaningless, but the fragile and unreliable are totally worth getting fully invested in, as are the joyful, the strong, the totally reliable things. 
So many people focus on the outcome of experiences, that they forget that the experience is an end unto itself.  The journey is the destination.
Sure if you're "dead" you won't have pain, but pain is the contrast to happiness so with no contrast, you can't experience happiness...which you seem to be discovering; what you need is a paradigm shift.


--------------------
"So it goes."
-Kurt Vonnegut


BlueBerry_Swisher said:I want French fries. No, I want a penis French. Thank you. I'm so excited. I can not contain myself. Now I eat chocolate. It is so good. I'm trying to rub it all over myself. And then lick. Now I need a hot shower. The end.


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Invisibledrawde
 Arcade Champion: Balloon Bomber


Registered: 11/15/09
Posts: 4,780
Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
    #531518 - 02/28/11 02:14 PM (5 years, 9 months ago)

Well... what do you want to do with your life?


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OfflineCage
Melancholy Mindfuck.


Registered: 01/13/11
Posts: 645
Last seen: 1 year, 10 months
Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: drawde]
    #531525 - 02/28/11 02:28 PM (5 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

drawde said:
Well... what do you want to do with your life?



Music, either for a living, or to have a living where I can still do the things I love, like music.


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Invisibledrawde
 Arcade Champion: Balloon Bomber


Registered: 11/15/09
Posts: 4,780
Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
    #531526 - 02/28/11 02:31 PM (5 years, 9 months ago)

Sounds as if you are putting far too much energy into analyzing all these feelings, energy that could be put to use in your music.


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OfflineMFDoom666
trash hoarder
Male User Gallery Arcade Champion: Arkanoid, Donkey Kong


Registered: 04/24/08
Posts: 8,842
Loc: emerica
Last seen: 1 month, 19 days
Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: drawde]
    #531586 - 02/28/11 09:04 PM (5 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

drawde said:
Sounds as if you are putting far too much energy into analyzing all these feelings, energy that could be put to use in your music.




--------------------

FurrowedBrow said:

They should teach african engineering at the college level.  mcgyver 101

Harry_Ba11sach said:

Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?


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OfflineCage
Melancholy Mindfuck.


Registered: 01/13/11
Posts: 645
Last seen: 1 year, 10 months
Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: MFDoom666]
    #531753 - 03/01/11 01:54 PM (5 years, 9 months ago)

I really can't help it, my mind is ALWAYS analyzing something, I overthink and obsess about everything, my mind leaves no stone unturned, and from what I can tell I'm gonna be living the rest of my life this way lol


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Invisibledrawde
 Arcade Champion: Balloon Bomber


Registered: 11/15/09
Posts: 4,780
Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
    #531754 - 03/01/11 02:23 PM (5 years, 9 months ago)

I would not pigeon-hole yourself into the mode of thinking that something is always going to be a certain way, as it in-itself can prolong that situation. I myself was there at one time, and I have since struck a balance.

OR... you could possibly use this to your advantage and analyze your analyzing. Could lead to some breakthroughs, or insanity. Hard to say.


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