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 Cage
Melancholy Mindfuck.
Registered: 01/13/11
Posts: 645
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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 Everything is so.. Monotone.. 
#531479 - 02/28/11 09:03 AM (15 years, 2 months ago) |
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I've been having this feeling for a while now.. I'm starting to suspect that I may be dead inside, or something.. I have the usual, short lived happy moments like always, that hasn't really changed. I guess I've gotten so used to things in my life being messed up somehow, and being stressed ALL the time, that I don't really notice it anymore. My emotions are like, a "get in, get out" task now, I'll be happy with something, and when it fucks up? I just kind of, stop caring.
I guess I've actually managed to rationalize my thoughts to the point where I don't really rely on my emotions for decisions that much anymore.. I guess being kind of, detached, is a down side, but so far it hasn't been that bad really.. I can just do certain things, like workout, without needing any real motivation or passion, I just tell myself to do it, and I do, without laziness or anything else being in the way. I guess there isn't much point to this thread, just kind of wanted to talk about this, and see if anyone's had any similar experiences, it's just weird to me. 
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DungenessDank
Lord of the Flies
Registered: 05/05/08
Posts: 9,372
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 12 years, 11 months
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Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
#531480 - 02/28/11 09:06 AM (15 years, 2 months ago) |
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You'll be happier dead inside.
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Cage
Melancholy Mindfuck.
Registered: 01/13/11
Posts: 645
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: DungenessDank]
#531485 - 02/28/11 09:16 AM (15 years, 2 months ago) |
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DungenessDank said:
You'll be happier dead inside.
Yeah, I was thinking that too.
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thenpc
The Flameworker
Registered: 01/21/11
Posts: 68
Last seen: 13 years, 1 month
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Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
#531487 - 02/28/11 09:24 AM (15 years, 2 months ago) |
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I get like that some times... for long amounts of time.
The only thing that I found brings me back to being connected with the world is an ego death, out in nature, but that's not for everyone.
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amiacriminal
just here
Registered: 02/28/11
Posts: 4
Last seen: 15 years, 1 month
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Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
#531488 - 02/28/11 09:24 AM (15 years, 2 months ago) |
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maybe you need to establish a solid sense of meaning in your life
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Cage
Melancholy Mindfuck.
Registered: 01/13/11
Posts: 645
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: amiacriminal]
#531491 - 02/28/11 09:36 AM (15 years, 2 months ago) |
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amiacriminal said:
maybe you need to establish a solid sense of meaning in your life
That's the thing, most things just seem fragile, unreliable, or just meaningless. Pretty much everything requires more effort than it's worth, so I ration emotion.
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81renaissance
Coachella '13 KKOTY
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 4,182
Loc: State of Mind 
Last seen: 2 years, 2 months
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Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
#531495 - 02/28/11 10:16 AM (15 years, 2 months ago) |
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Cage said:
amiacriminal said:
maybe you need to establish a solid sense of meaning in your life
That's the thing, most things just seem fragile, unreliable, or just meaningless. Pretty much everything requires more effort than it's worth, so I ration emotion.
I disagree with the "happier dead inside" concepts.
The whole point isn't that things require more effort than they're worth, its just that people define "worth" incorrectly.
Stay away from the meaningless, but the fragile and unreliable are totally worth getting fully invested in, as are the joyful, the strong, the totally reliable things.
So many people focus on the outcome of experiences, that they forget that the experience is an end unto itself. The journey is the destination.
Sure if you're "dead" you won't have pain, but pain is the contrast to happiness so with no contrast, you can't experience happiness...which you seem to be discovering; what you need is a paradigm shift.
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"So it goes."
-Kurt Vonnegut
BlueBerry_Swisher said:I want French fries. No, I want a penis French. Thank you. I'm so excited. I can not contain myself. Now I eat chocolate. It is so good. I'm trying to rub it all over myself. And then lick. Now I need a hot shower. The end.
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 drawde
Registered: 11/15/09
Posts: 5,268
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Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
#531518 - 02/28/11 12:14 PM (15 years, 2 months ago) |
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Well... what do you want to do with your life?
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King Koopa said:
The amount of pot that Gask smokes is equivalent to a guy shooting heroin on weekends
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Cage
Melancholy Mindfuck.
Registered: 01/13/11
Posts: 645
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: drawde]
#531525 - 02/28/11 12:28 PM (15 years, 2 months ago) |
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drawde said:
Well... what do you want to do with your life?
Music, either for a living, or to have a living where I can still do the things I love, like music.
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drawde
Registered: 11/15/09
Posts: 5,268
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Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
#531526 - 02/28/11 12:31 PM (15 years, 2 months ago) |
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Sounds as if you are putting far too much energy into analyzing all these feelings, energy that could be put to use in your music.
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King Koopa said:
The amount of pot that Gask smokes is equivalent to a guy shooting heroin on weekends
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MFDoom666
trash hoarder
Registered: 04/24/08
Posts: 8,842
Loc: emerica
Last seen: 8 years, 5 months
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Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: drawde]
#531586 - 02/28/11 07:04 PM (15 years, 2 months ago) |
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drawde said:
Sounds as if you are putting far too much energy into analyzing all these feelings, energy that could be put to use in your music.
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FurrowedBrow said:
They should teach african engineering at the college level. mcgyver 101
Harry_Ba11sach said:
Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
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Cage
Melancholy Mindfuck.
Registered: 01/13/11
Posts: 645
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: MFDoom666]
#531753 - 03/01/11 11:54 AM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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I really can't help it, my mind is ALWAYS analyzing something, I overthink and obsess about everything, my mind leaves no stone unturned, and from what I can tell I'm gonna be living the rest of my life this way lol
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drawde
Registered: 11/15/09
Posts: 5,268
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Re: Everything is so.. Monotone.. [Re: Cage]
#531754 - 03/01/11 12:23 PM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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I would not pigeon-hole yourself into the mode of thinking that something is always going to be a certain way, as it in-itself can prolong that situation. I myself was there at one time, and I have since struck a balance.
OR... you could possibly use this to your advantage and analyze your analyzing. Could lead to some breakthroughs, or insanity. Hard to say.
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King Koopa said:
The amount of pot that Gask smokes is equivalent to a guy shooting heroin on weekends
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