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 Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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 thinking bout moving back east 
#638617 - 09/27/12 08:47 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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well as many of you guys have known, I have been battling opiate addiction for a number of years left and it is absolutely sucking the soul out of me, taking away the enjoyment of everyday life.
So, my dad offered me to move to PA, and live with him... this would be a pretty big move from Arizona to somewhere completely new. I do have a sister nearby my dads and she has 3 kids of her own, so thatd be kind of cool to be around
Just having a hard time deciding what is the right next step.
If I do leave Arizona, then I turn my back on my mom who I have been helping take care of on and off since I was 15 years old, shes always been sick and had health issues.
Really dont know what is the best move at this point. I am really leaning towards just taking the money I have now, and moving to PA. I have plenty saved and could easily make the move....
Maybe talk about it here??
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 drawde
Registered: 11/15/09
Posts: 5,268
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 Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#638618 - 09/27/12 08:49 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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skool?
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King Koopa said:
The amount of pot that Gask smokes is equivalent to a guy shooting heroin on weekends
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Stoneth
D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.
Registered: 10/06/08
Posts: 24,983
Loc: No where ville, USA 
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: drawde]
#638619 - 09/27/12 08:54 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
drawde said:
skool?
Yeah this.
Do you have plans in place for that.
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: drawde]
#638621 - 09/27/12 09:02 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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I got at least another 2 years of school and dont know if I got the drive for it anyways... I dont know..
At a weird spot right now. Detoxing alone at my apartment.
My dad just made the offer and a lot of what he's saying sounds pretty good.. start over, meet all new people... just hard at the same to give up everything I know
There is also a small legal issue. I still have part of my DUI hanging over my head out here, so if I stay in Arizona, I am going to owe 45 more days in the shitter.. I think it's just time to try something fresh
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Manitou
Indépendantiste
Registered: 05/03/11
Posts: 7,121
Loc: Québecédelic
Last seen: 1 hour, 18 minutes
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#638623 - 09/27/12 09:07 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Have you tried talking about that problem with your mother?
Maybe she'll make you see things in a completely different way, if you move to Arizona, new place, I hope you don't have connections for opiates in that place? I think it could definitely help you, but I personally don't think you'd be turning your back on your mother considering she might even encourage you with that decision if you think it would help you surpass opiates addiction.
Then again there's probably a lot more going on in your life that we don't know, I guess its a really huge decision to make...
Good luck with any of your decisions man, I hope good thangs for you in the incoming future!
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Pour un instant, j'ai respiré très fort
Ça m'a permis de visiter mon corps
Des inconnus vivent en roi chez moi
Moi qui avait accepté leurs lois
J'ai perdu mon temps à gagner du temps
J'ai besoin de me trouver une histoire à me conter
Pour instant j'ai oublié mon nom
Harmonium - Pour un instant
--------------------------------------------
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ltd
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 6,042
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez] 1
#638643 - 09/28/12 03:01 AM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Banez, listen.
Fuck the opiates man, they're fucking wack.
Move to PA, get your head on straight, get your shit together.
Then decide where to go from there.
Don't forget about your Ma, tho.
Talk to her about it first, make sure she understands why.
Make sure you can come back and visit her occasionally.
GTFO AZ, say goodbye to opiates, start life anew.
Good luck bro and if you ever need anything, holla.
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Fisherman
Stranger
Registered: 08/15/10
Posts: 940
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: ltd]
#638646 - 09/28/12 04:23 AM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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best wishes picklez, if it helps at all, I know life is a dream and were gonna make it out alright, real magic does exist.
Just something different
Best of luck and good wind to you
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: ltd]
#638670 - 09/28/12 12:33 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
ltd said:
Banez, listen.
Fuck the opiates man, they're fucking wack.
Move to PA, get your head on straight, get your shit together.
Then decide where to go from there.
Don't forget about your Ma, tho.
Talk to her about it first, make sure she understands why.
Make sure you can come back and visit her occasionally.
GTFO AZ, say goodbye to opiates, start life anew.
Good luck bro and if you ever need anything, holla.
Thanks man, I really appreciate it
I think this is the best option
My Ma supports me in that decision.
And thanks Fisherman
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drawde
Registered: 11/15/09
Posts: 5,268
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#638677 - 09/28/12 12:59 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Just cant understand why you would put so much effort into getting back to school and then drop it all the sudden. Doesnt seem to me like your addiction will be overcome by simply moving away.
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King Koopa said:
The amount of pot that Gask smokes is equivalent to a guy shooting heroin on weekends
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Hawksresurrection
Registered: 12/04/08
Posts: 13,464
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: drawde]
#638680 - 09/28/12 01:05 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Actually getting away from the ways you know how to score more helps a lot. Not saying he couldn't figure it out in the new city, but it makes it more difficult, which makes you think harder about actually doing it.
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Dude she isn't as young as she use to be.
-niteowl
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Quote:
hawksapprentice said:
Actually getting away from the ways you know how to score more helps a lot. Not saying he couldn't figure it out in the new city, but it makes it more difficult, which makes you think harder about actually doing it.
Yeah and my dad is in a pretty rural area, so im sure it's not going to be on every single corner like it is here in Phoenix. This place is the drug mecca. Everything comes through here it seems
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King Koopa
Natty
Registered: 06/25/08
Posts: 12,817
Last seen: 3 days, 7 hours
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: drawde]
#638682 - 09/28/12 01:11 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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There's other things that play into each person's addiction. In a lot of cases, mental illnesses can distort a users reasoning when it come's to that person's addiction, like depression, asperghers syndrome, even boredom.
It's hard to figure out what's really going on with Picklez because of the deceitful and lack of information on his disease. We all know he's in trouble, but the only things we have for him is posts (be it negative or positive doesn't necessarily matter). I mean, how are we supposed to the situation seriously with his half-hearted attempts for advise coupled with his habitual destructive behavior?
It's hard to not feel trolled with this machine being used as a medium for communication.
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Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from alcoholism.
The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking. There are no dues or fees for A.A. membership; we are self-supporting through our own contributions. A.A. is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization or institution; does not wish to engage in any controversy; neither endorses nor opposes any causes. Our primary purpose is to stay sober and help other alcoholics to achieve sobriety.
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: King Koopa]
#638685 - 09/28/12 01:15 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
King Koopa said:
It's hard to not feel trolled with this machine being used as a medium for communication.
Sorry you feel that way. Not many people around me have suffered through addiction at all so they arent good people to talk about it with. Ive had a pretty public struggle with it. But have been much better lately, I was doing awesome at the halfway house and shit, but fucked up as soon as I got out on my own
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King Koopa
Natty
Registered: 06/25/08
Posts: 12,817
Last seen: 3 days, 7 hours
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#638687 - 09/28/12 01:24 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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I just said that to add to the already "mess" I contribute to your situation off-the-net. And when I say mess, I mean your addiction along with your posts about. I tend not to care about users as people.
Quote:
Picklez said:
Ive had a pretty public struggle with it. But have been much better lately, I was doing awesome at the halfway house and shit, but fucked up as soon as I got out on my own
With you being a psychedelic consumer, I'm sure you understand your processes of introspection a bit more clearly and you can surely understand you're more than just a person who reacts. You know the thought process that takes you that place you don't want to go as you reflect. And as you reflect, SURELY you understand the cues in which you slip into that justification of another fix.
I'm saying this because I've never seen a post from you that explains any of this, you always say what you did and what you want to do. Which is why I brought up the "deceitfulness" of your side of it all. Not saying you purposely leave out a lot information needed to analyse the situation properly. It could be for emotional protection. I don't know.
I hope I'm being clear.
--------------------
Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from alcoholism.
The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking. There are no dues or fees for A.A. membership; we are self-supporting through our own contributions. A.A. is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization or institution; does not wish to engage in any controversy; neither endorses nor opposes any causes. Our primary purpose is to stay sober and help other alcoholics to achieve sobriety.
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: King Koopa]
#638689 - 09/28/12 01:29 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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What gets me back to using?... Usually I start drinking and once I got a good buzz I hit up my guy who can get shit pretty much 24/7, then after picking up enough for 2-3 days, then I generally dont have the self control to stop myself from picking up more
I made it just under a month this last time, so I know that I can do it, but I think in the longterm, a move out to my dads might be good for me. I can always move back out here once I get shit together
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Fisherman
Stranger
Registered: 08/15/10
Posts: 940
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#638696 - 09/28/12 02:00 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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rural areas are the best places in the world to live : )
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drawde
Registered: 11/15/09
Posts: 5,268
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Fisherman]
#638703 - 09/28/12 02:32 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Sometimes your alright, Fisherman. 
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King Koopa said:
The amount of pot that Gask smokes is equivalent to a guy shooting heroin on weekends
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still beLIEve
State Property..Again
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,167
Loc: a world thats not my own
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: drawde]
#638747 - 09/28/12 08:35 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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moving may get you away from your sources, and im sure that would help. but moving doesn't change the fact that you have an addictive personality or your chances of being hooked on something again.
if you really want to change you have to find it within yourself. join a program of some sort, find something that made you quit.
i'll be honest i didn't have the strength to do it myself, and when i got arrested i was forced to stay sober because of the program i was put in. that being said as much as i wish i had my freedom back i wouldn't take back my arrest even if i could. i had blacked out and woke up in emergency rooms 3 times in the 6 month prior to getting arrested. this program saved my life.
and now i have under 4 months left. and to be honest im kind of nervous. i'd like to think i have a much better head on my shoulders now. that im actually doing good and have shit going for me that i don't want to ruin. that the relationships in my life are actually worth a shit now and i don't compromise that. that i keep good people around me now.
but you know addicts, it's always unpredictable.
i would try to get shit going for yourself. what really puts me in a shit state of mind is not going anywhere in my life. if im just stagnant and not accomplishing anything positive or worthwhile im much more likely to fuck up my life. because i don't feel i'm working towards anything, so why not? not being honest with my family and not taking advice are warning signs for me too.
if i were you i would try to do good in school. i would get a job. i would surround yourself with good people. you are the people you put yourself around. today i try to be around successful people that i can have meaningful, intelligent conversations with. not people that want to get fucked up, and talk about how awesome or cool it is, and have no ambition in life.
set goals for yourself and accomplish them. you always talk about stuff, and go through the motions to do it and then when you actually get it you bail out for one reason or another. heres another tip - us addicts will sabotage anything going good for us. guess what? not everything in life will be awesome, not everyone will be nice to you, some things and some people will suck. it doesn't mean 'fuck it things aren't fair im just gonna bail'. it means grit your teeth, suck it up and do it. once you have don't that long enough you will be able to actually do something.
do something positive. keep going to school. push yourself. find hobbies to do and get a job. don't give yourself free time.
good luck, i wish you the best.
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niteowl said:
See, that term pedo gets thrown around a lot.
Is a 16 year old guy having sex w/a 16 year old girl a pedophile?
If not, then how is a 30 year old considered a pedophile for doing the same thing?
I think y'all need to look up the definition for pedophile.
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P-O
Registered: 10/08/11
Posts: 17,891
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#638758 - 09/28/12 11:50 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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finish school lad!
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Darwin23
Darwin
Registered: 11/01/11
Posts: 41
Loc: United States
Last seen: 8 years, 1 month
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: P-O]
#638827 - 09/29/12 05:52 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Really different cultures, but I suppose if you're "moving back" that means you've already lived in the East before.
My cousin needed to do what you're thinking of doing to get clean off opiates. He moved out to my house after living in a state over selling weed/pills and using being hopelessly addicted to them. He had to leave that whole life behind. Left his mom and little brother. They were raided from crack a couple months after he left. He feels guilty about leaving, but knows if he didn't he'd still be an addict.
I wish you the best, man. Addiction sucks.
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Darwin23]
#638831 - 09/29/12 07:15 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Thanks, yeah I have lived in Ohio before, never in PA.
I got a sister and she has 3 kids there too, so there is that also
I am just worried I get there and I cant get a job or anything and find out it sucks just as much as being out here
At least if I leave I dont have to spend 45 days in jail though
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#638853 - 09/30/12 08:33 AM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Pretty locked into my decision to move unless I manage to get a job here in the next couple weeks.
Working on my 5th day without opiates, sleep tonight would be nice.
If I can get thru Monday with no problems and I am feeling good enough to tackle school, I still have a pretty legit shot at passing my classes this semester, except for one class that is on Monday, Wednesday, Friday; Fucked up thing was, I was doing awesome in that class. Got a 93 on first exam and was doing good on quizzes and what not.
Debating whether or not to go to the Cardinals football game today. Got free tickets but I think I would rather stay at home and try and do something productive. and lay around a bunch lol
Edited by Picklez (09/30/12 08:38 AM)
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#638935 - 09/30/12 11:25 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Hm, decisions decisions...
I just paid Octobers rent today and still had a decent chunk of change left for November.....
My money situation is at least alright. I got 300 bucks still saved up even after dropping 460$ today. Got the opportunity to make another 200-250 bucks here in about a week, working for my stepdad on their new land. Basically driving a tractor and clearing the land.
Start the alcohol classes tomorrow. I either do the classes and cough up another 325$, or I skip out and the judge puts out a warrant for my arrest. But the only way for me to stay in Arizona and not go back to jail, would be to go through these classes. Might talk to the judge and see about just doing the 45 days, but see if he would grant "Work Release,"... Jail sentences where you get out for a couple hours a day during the week makes doing time pretty cake-walk
I am just praying I can get a job. That would make everything a hell of a lot easier on me. Havent heard back from Walmart yet. It's now been 8 days since I took the drug test and they started running a background check. So I think they should have gotten all the info they needed. I am going to call in tomorrow and find out why I failed.
Time to stop doing drugs so I can just pass a fucking drug test especially with all these damn seasonal positions.
Hope everyone had a good weekend.
I am getting ready for bed. I got a lot to try and get done tomorrow. Getting my new state ID card and possibly going to see the judge....
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#638948 - 10/01/12 12:36 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Got a job interview at best buy
still havent heard from walmart. im guessing i failed the pee test or something
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Hawksresurrection
Registered: 12/04/08
Posts: 13,464
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#638954 - 10/01/12 01:51 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Ugh, I'm applying at best buy right now, I hate these fucking online applications.
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Dude she isn't as young as she use to be.
-niteowl
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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They used to be a lot worse. Like just a year ago they all used to use they same company and do these stupid personalty tests.. I have had to do some little quizes but nothing as bad as they used to be
I would be working in computers at Best Buy 
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Hawksresurrection
Registered: 12/04/08
Posts: 13,464
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#638977 - 10/01/12 03:54 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Yeah I finished it. I hate applying for jobs online....
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Dude she isn't as young as she use to be.
-niteowl
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DungenessDank
Lord of the Flies
Registered: 05/05/08
Posts: 9,372
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 10 years, 10 months
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You need Jesus brahs
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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At least I got calls back from the places I did them at, except Target. They are very picky about who they hire for some reason...
Good luck with your applications
I am going to keep praying that I get a phone call in the next couple days telling me when to start at Walmart. Will all come down to that synthetic urine and whether or not it worked.
At least now I have a little heads up to stop smoking weed so I can pass the Best Buy drug test. And I will know whether or not the fake piss works by then too.
Things could be looking up if I landed one of or both of these jobs. I got a friend staying with me for 1 1/2 months so I am making a little money off that. Got 1 month until next rent is due
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Hawksresurrection
Registered: 12/04/08
Posts: 13,464
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#638981 - 10/01/12 04:23 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Fake has worked for me in the past....it shouldn't be a problem. Whenever I've taken a drug test, I justend up getting a call back from the employer asking me to start at a certain time.
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Dude she isn't as young as she use to be.
-niteowl
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P-O
Registered: 10/08/11
Posts: 17,891
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get ur class 1 dudes...
i drive a gravel truck all day. make 19 a hr... (Started at $18). I smoke kush ALLL day at work (most construction crews are pot heads). Never had to do a drug test
if i wanted to work 1.5 hrs away, id start at $35 a hr (oil patch)
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: P-O]
#639024 - 10/01/12 11:40 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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I am still doing shit for my DUI, so that's out for awhile.
I actually started my classes tonight. Biggest waste of money ever but whatever. We literally did nothing. We got in a circle, and all the new people had to talk about themselves and answer questions about how drunk we were and shit. Then we had a smoke break. then a random politics talk. These people are hustlers. I need to go in the business of offering alcohol treatment classes, holy shit this is a scam.
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Alounacara
Born to be banned....
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 6,619
Loc: Spicemaster, Texas
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 Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#639029 - 10/02/12 01:12 AM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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You missed the MNF game, it was a good one
I drank several beers in your honor with every int Romo threw.
I was kinda tipsy by half time
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You never see a motorcycle parked outside a psychiatrist office
Texas is humongus compared to France
Our Gair, who art in Texas,
Paw Paw be thy Name..
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Hawksresurrection
Registered: 12/04/08
Posts: 13,464
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Alounacara]
#639039 - 10/02/12 02:31 AM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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They got stomped by the bears. It was awesome.
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Dude she isn't as young as she use to be.
-niteowl
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RasJeph
Psycho Pete
Registered: 01/14/09
Posts: 11,657
Loc: Bumfuckt Egypt
Last seen: 5 months, 14 days
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#639045 - 10/02/12 07:09 AM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Pa and Ohio are both close enough for us to get together for a sess sometime.
Keep that in mind 
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Of course it's happening inside your head.
Why should that mean it isn't real?
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: RasJeph]
#639059 - 10/02/12 12:35 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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I have lots of friends in central ohio. where abouts are you from?
I spent 17 years of my life there
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RasJeph
Psycho Pete
Registered: 01/14/09
Posts: 11,657
Loc: Bumfuckt Egypt
Last seen: 5 months, 14 days
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#639087 - 10/02/12 07:55 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Not Ohio but close enough to drive there to smoke with a growery dude B)
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Of course it's happening inside your head.
Why should that mean it isn't real?
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: RasJeph]
#639133 - 10/03/12 05:14 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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We'll see what happens with these jobs and shit. If everything goes well, I will probably end up staying here. I will go through the 6 day detox program where they set you up with subutex and ween you off over a week on it.
What state are you in? Indiana?
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RasJeph
Psycho Pete
Registered: 01/14/09
Posts: 11,657
Loc: Bumfuckt Egypt
Last seen: 5 months, 14 days
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: Picklez]
#639135 - 10/03/12 07:12 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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Bounce between ny and vt every weekend :P
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Of course it's happening inside your head.
Why should that mean it isn't real?
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: thinking bout moving back east [Re: RasJeph]
#639138 - 10/03/12 07:49 PM (11 years, 6 months ago) |
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right on man, I will definitely hit you up if I end up out that way
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